So what actually works? I look at it two ways. The first way is that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. My family, on my mother's side in particular, uses a lot of extremely old fashioned remedies and methods. One example is how we wean our kiddos (from a bottle, pacifier, or potty training). We use the farmer's almanac to decide the best days to start weaning. (If you're interested, here is the link: best days to potty train/wean) So from that standpoint, my parents parent's spanked them when they acted up, and my parents spanked me when I got out of line... so logically I would spank my children. I mean, I'm ok, right?
Right?
I am definitely NOT ok. I am agressive, and have a really bad temper. It doesn't take much to get my blood boiling.Some might attribute it to my Irish heritage. (Before someone that has met me chimes in, you would say that I look nothing like someone with Irish decent, but that's because of the Native American on my mother's side. So suck it... ;)...) But I prefer to blame my parents. Not because I don't think they did everything in their power to be great parents, but because they spanked me, so now I really believe the hype that I am predisposed to hit. But I don't just want to spank my daughter to discipline, I want to hit anyone that I think needs to be reprimanded. I don't. I am capable of knowing what is socially acceptable and what isn't, I'm just saying what I want to do... I will admit, however that I have a big problem making normal connections in my brain with how to act, with regard to emotion... but I doubt that has much to do with my parents.
Either way, I wonder if maybe I should be doing more time outs, and taking toys away, but I don't know if my kiddo will actually get it.... Let me know what you think. What is YOUR standpoint on all this? Comment below!!!
I only ever spanked my kids out of fear, when both my son and daughter ran across the road they got a clip, because they scared the crap out of me and I wanted them to learn that lesson very quickly so, because I had not used spanking to an excess they never ran into a road again. I was much more successful in grounding my daughter she hated not being able to go out with her friends and my son Honestly this is the truth has never, since running across the road ever done anything to warrant a telling off, he's 16 now I keep waiting for those rebellious years but so far nothing, he starts college in September to study forensic science, my daughter was always the little shit, and always in some kind of trouble but I can count on one hand the amount of times I raised my hand to her 3 to be precise, but when her Dad and I split, she told me he used to hit her every time she did something wrong (wanker)sha's ok now she joined the forces and travels the world,she does get angry very easily but has learned to controll it . So you can see where I'm going with this, I had so much trouble and heartache with my daughter who was spanked, and absolutely nothing with my son who got one clip growing up.
ReplyDeleteNever got spanked. My mother always said she would never spank in anger, and once she was not angry she never thought the best way to handle a situation was by hitting. Of course, I was the perfect child.... No really. Okay, maybe not. But then my first reaction is not violence either. And my mother's side is Irish, but people say u don't look it either;)
ReplyDeleteFunny, you and I are cut from the same cloth. I regularly wants to beat my children... but I don't.
ReplyDeleteOn average, I say each of my kids gets spanked once a year and that is for a VERY egregious. The last time my oldest got spanked (like six months ago - and it was more like a scary swat on the ass) was when he pushed his brother WHILE at the top of the stairs. He never did that again...
I find that time outs (coupled with refusing to argue, negotiate or give the boys a platform) works quite well...
So I guess that settles it. I will consistently beat my child regularly.... in my brain, Ally McBeal style.
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